Sitting on "I don't know"...

Enduring the unknowns can be a draining experience for most of us. Whether you are waiting for the results of a test, or the outcome of a possible job,we tend to want the answers now.

In the waiting we can learn patience and gain wisdom and allow our inner sorting process to happen naturally...in other words sitting with our "I don't know" and not forcing ourselves into making commitments or decisions before we really know what is best.

Over my life I have always been uncomfortable in the unknowns. When will it happen, what will it be like, will he or she be safe, what is the outcome of decision I just made?  Unknown answers can consume you and your spirit.

So how do we live in the unknowns? I think our task while waiting in the unknowns is to accept the process as creative and productive. I have found my walk with God to be the most trusting place I can be in the waiting period. Most of our answers will unfold from an internal questioning period in which the only honest and authentic reality is  "I don't know." And that is okay. Before you make a decision, especially a life changing one, you may need to sit in the "I don't know" phase for awhile.

The reason we say "I don't know" is that we really don't know.  Otherwise you would have a quick yes or no answer. So that little nagging and unsettling feeling can be a time to gather the information necessary to make valid decisions.

Although sitting with our "I don't knows" may feel like an endless free-fall, we must trust God on the way down, for He is the only one who can help you up. Without trust you question your faith, and when you question your faith you may lose God.

Be gentle and kind with yourself. Don't be in such a hurry. Life goes by fast enough, enjoy the journey and all it brings.


So if you are in the "I don't know" today, rest easy, trust wholeheartedly, and start trusting yourself to make good decisions...and above all call on God to lead the way.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. (2 Cor.4:18)

Everytime a bell rings...

This is National Donor Awareness Month. I am reminded everyday that I am a kidney transplant survivor and remain humbled that I have been given such a gift. A gift of life that has afforded me nine wonderful years of life that would never have been possible.

My living donor, my son Eric and my grandson Dylan give me pause to stop, be thankful and not take my daily life for granted.

This past Sunday I attended an event for Donor families, families and loved ones that have lost someone special in their lives. The event was held in a small chapel at St. Joseph's Hospital in Phoenix. I was assigned as a volunteer to greet the families coming to pay tribute to their love ones. I felt honored to be a part of this day.

I was suddenly aware of the stillness and reverence in the chapel as family members quietly displayed their photos and mementos on a table and took to their seats. As if God himself had entered the room surrounded by His angels, you could almost feel the donors sitting near their loved ones as they told stories of joy, love, laughter, loss, and profound sadness.

The ceremony started and a woman started telling the story of the significance of a ringing bell. My favorite description was from "It's a Wonderful Life", if you have seen the movie you remember the line "When a bell rings an angel gets his wings."  What a lovely thought.

As each family member approached and told their story a bell rang in the silence and was presented as a gift to the donor families. At the end of all the stories they were told to ring their bell and celebrate the life of the one that gave life to another. The angels came alive in the room, you could feel their presence as the bells rang loudly and with such love.

The resounding sound sent chills down my spine and brought me to a place of sadness and joy that is hard to describe. As if heaven itself had touched the room, there were tears of grief, tears of gratefulness for those of use who received the gift, and a little of God's presence that was there to be embraced.

I was present that day to experience a once in a lifetime moment of profound gratitude. Be present in your own life and in the life of others.  Take the time to listen and take the time to receive a gift that is heaven sent...God's unconditional love and His grace.  Take the time to bless someone as you are blessed in return.

I say thank you to all who have or will consider being a donor, you will never know how it can impact a life. And a special thank you to my son Eric for changing my life and giving me years that I never thought I would have. You are my angel.

So the next time you hear a bell ring, think of all the angels and their families who gave the most unselfish of gifts, life...and be thankful for yours.

Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is within your power to act. Proverbs 3:27 NIV

Faith and fear...

Faith and fear, do these words have anything in common? If you look at each word separately, they appear to be very different...but are they?

Fear: As a verb it means: 1. to have a reverent awe of God. 2. to be afraid of 3.to be apprehensive.
As a noun: 1. an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by expectation or awareness of danger. 2. anxious concern 3. profound reverence especially toward God.

Faith: 1.allegiance to duty or a person. 2. belief and trust in God 3.complete trust. 4. a system of religious beliefs.

You can see that both definitions use God in their description. In the fear description it is used twice. Why is that? I think because we all have fear, and we all have faith. Each of us carries around a little of each every day.

Some people think that having faith is only a Christian objective. I think faith is an unseen secret we all have access to, just as fear is an emotion we all feel at different times throughout our lives.

When you walk in fear you are not trusting God, and when your faith is intact, you are able to walk through the fear. Sounds like an oxymoron, but it is not. They really do go hand in hand.

Faith and fear are companions of sorts. They use the same energy, both good and bad. Fear can cripple us, faith can set us free. I was surprised how these two words seem so symbiotic.

Use your imagination for a moment and entertain the word fear and what is conjures up in you? Does it mean the inability to move forward, maybe a physical fear that pain may result in walking through your fear? That is all is your own imagination. You only imagine what may happen, you aren't certain?

Faith used in your imagination can bring up feelings of uncertainly, being fearful of the unknown, yet allowing our faith to carry us through is getting through the fear. Faith can bring you comfort, hope and a sense of peace that dispels your fears.

When this world becomes a fearful place, give me faith. When uncertainty and doubt creeps into my imagination give me faith. In every aspect of my life, Lord, and in every circumstance, give me faith so I may walk through my fear.

Faith and fear use the same imagination...Gerri Galiffa

I sought the LORD , and he answered me; he delivered me from my fears. Psalm 34:4 NIV

Miracles...

I love this picture of the sky and the radiant light shining through the clouds. I think heaven might be right beyond the purple haze.

I have been thinking about miracles that have occurred in my life over the past few days, and wanted to share a few thoughts about how people view miracles, or indeed if they believe in them at all?

A miracle is defined as an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs. Also, an unusual event, thing, or accomplishment.

We live in a time of miracles, yet many people think they have an answer as to why something happens or does not. Cynics may call it logic, I would call it a miracle.

Do you believe in miracles?  I have believed in miracles all my life. I have had too many close encounters to think I just have good luck!!

We see miracles unfold everyday. A newborn baby, a stunning sunrise or sunset,the amazing works of nature and its many unanswered splendors. We witness physical and emotional healing and personal success, we witness unmerited favor, and wonder why some get more than others?

We all hear the stories, you have to be at the right place at the right time, then good things happen, or if you are in the wrong place at the wrong time bad things will happen.  But I have never thought that luck or a certain timing was part of the deal. I believe there is a purpose for everything in its own time. Wouldn't it be lovely if we could control time and outcomes, but we cannot. So we must continue to believe.

If you take note of an unusual occurrence or event, and you can't explain it away through logic and or reason, you might want to call it a miracle. What else could it be? Not everything that occurs in life has a concrete explanation.

It would be so sad to live in a world of absolutes, I like it when life surprises me, I like it when something unexplainable happens.  It increases my faith, my own personal belief in God, and it reminds me to  continue to dream my dreams and believe in the impossible.

Because we are imperfect human beings, we sometimes place limitations on God. But, God's power has no limitations. God will work miracles in our lives in we continue to trust Him.

I think if you look around in your own life today, you might find a small miracle...you need only to open your eyes, your ears, and your heart. The miracle in front of you may be you.

We have a God who delights in impossibilities...Andrew Murray

You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples...Psalm 77:14 NIV

Reap the love...

Valentine's Day is right around the corner, what are you giving your loved one? What would you like to receive from your loved one?

Browsing through the store today I noted flowers, heart shaped candy, roses, stuffed animals, rose petals, cookies, cakes, love Cd's, videos, beautiful cards, a plethora of goods to entice a loved one.

So many kinds of love...Love of a husband, wife, family, friends, grandchildren, neighbors, strangers and of course the greatest of these...the love of God.

Like the little girl carrying her small bouquet of fragrant flowers, she walks towards a moment wisely chosen. This little girl could be me today, feeling like I have a life time ahead of me, filled with wonder, adventures, expectations, new possibilities, new friendships, and always the love of God by my side. You need not be a little one to enjoy whatever time you have here on this earthly plane.

Most of our heart-held relationships, those that add to our lives and multiply our blessings, are fairly drought-resistant, they can thrive on bursts of concentrated love and attention.  If nurturing and sustaining our relationships feels like yet another energy-draining obligation, I think we need to change our perception and see friendship as a sacred, life-enhancing gift we give and receive.

Give yourself and others the gift of time...Allow yourself ten minutes a day of quiet and solitude. Make no demands on how to use that time; just relax and be open and still...and see what God has for you. Receive the gift of God's time by listening and allowing Him into your very being. We can learn so much by being open and then become the vessel through which God works.

Today is the day to reap the time...tomorrow is the time to enjoy that which you have created and brought forth.

Today is the day to reap the love your heart desires.  It really doesn't take much, just your time. You can keep the spirit of Valentine's Day alive everyday by reaching out to one another through love.

Love one another deeply, from the heart. 1 Peter 1:22 NIV