Prince Charming...

It is a warm spring day, perfect for a picnic and an afternoon of love. Sitting on a boat with  a kind gentle man, a soft breeze gently blowing my hair away from my face, the sound of water ripples in the background, and the smell of honeysuckle fills my nostrils. A toast and a sip of red wine warms my soul and my cheeks blush a scarlet red. It is a day of love and anticipation of what lie ahead?

Well here I am a 67 year old woman thinking about when I was waiting for my Prince Charming and visualizing this scene in my mind's eye.  After 45 years in a relationship that was disappointing and sometimes painful, I guess I am still waiting for my Prince Charming?

Waiting for Prince Charming is a childhood fantasy that does not relate in my real adult world. What is it that I need to let go of, what do I want for my future? Am I going to walk the rest of my journey alone or with another?

First I need to let go of the past which is not an easy job. I am glad I am awake and see the pitfalls of what I have expected of myself and how perfect I have thought I needed to be. I had this need to be perfect for my husband, my parents, my children, friends and co workers. Guess what, I was never perfect, nor can anyone be perfect!  I don't know why we try and live in that fantasy!  A lofty and heavy burden to carry, I am letting go of the luggage, one bag at a time.

I am determined to not beat myself up every time I back slide or feel anger or sadness. I will learn to embrace it and work through the process. After all that is what life is, feeling, moving forward and learning as we go. The journey is never done, and just when we think it is we are tested. Our faith, patience and world itself is tested everyday?  I am often walking in blind faith. I can't see where I am going or where I will end up, but I have to trust God and keep trusting that He knows how my own personal journey will end.

What I would like in my life is to be with someone who sees me, has a God filled spirit and love of the Lord as do I, and will walk along side of me for the rest of my said journey. No great expectations, just love, warmth, mutual respect, and a giving to one another that requires nothing but pure love. Maybe it is a lot to ask for, but what a lovely way to spend the rest of ones life.

So I won't sit around waiting for my Prince Charming...I will just be waiting with a knowing that the right person will come along, if not in person at least in my dreams!

I have made many mistakes in my life, but if you made a mistake, even serious mistakes, there is always another chance for you because this thing we call "failure" in not the falling down, but the staying down.

Let your own mistakes become lessons and our lives become adventures in growth, not stagnation.